


Of Reindeer and Vampires

by yellowsubmarines



Category: Xanje
Genre: I'm so sorry, Other, a complete crack fic, an almost not!fic, this is gonna be terrible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-11
Updated: 2015-10-11
Packaged: 2018-04-25 22:23:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4978801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yellowsubmarines/pseuds/yellowsubmarines
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>creative writing amirite lol</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Reindeer and Vampires

**Author's Note:**

> disclaimer: this is not supposed to be taken seriously  
> i did not take this seriously writing it  
> don't take it seriously reading it
> 
> you have been warned

"Rein!"

The deer did not listen. She continued running towards the light, not turning back and definitely not following the orders of her deer pack. (do those even exist)

"Rein! You cannot go any further!"

It was the voice of the leader, the one with the biggest and strongest antlers. Not only was he the leader, he was her FATHER! Rein continued to not listen, though, what a champ. She was getting so close to the light, she couldn't stop now! Nothing could stop her. She felt powerful, everything felt lighter. Her hooves seemed to be barely scraping the ground as she sprinted towards the glowing tunnel. No way was she turning around. She had to find out what was on the other side!

"You must stop!"

Just a few feet away. The distressed voices faded out into the background, and Rein took a leap into the light. Then, all of a sudden, things were like WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHH and Rein felt like she was flying through the freaking air. She couldn't see anything though so she was like, wtf where am I. What is happening.

And then she got thrown out of the portal, into a strange and mysterious world full of strange and mysterious creatures. They were everywhere! One even came up towards her - a large, black, furry human-like thing with huge hands. It made an ARUGAHROO noise and then sniffed her.

"Id!" a voice screamed behind the strange creature. "Leave the newbie alone!" The creature - Id - made a small grumble noise before running away on all fours. Then, a lady came up closer and closer to her. An actual human! Rein had never witnessed one before, especially not so close to her. The human smiled and waved. "Hello, I am Wynn! Welcome to Xanje."

Rein stared at her kinda confused because what is a Xanje, what is a Wynn, where is she, and what the actual frickle frack was that strange creature that was sniffing her up.

"What is your name?" the Wynn asked. Rein was like, Rein, kinda like Reindeer because I am a deer, get it? And they both were like LOL WHAT A COINCIDENCE MAN, THAT IS SO HILARIOUS!

So Wynn was walking with Rein and was like, yo, this be Xanje man and here is what everything is and here is Id, he is the Whammy god, and here are all the pet species and if you come to this little shack here you can buy some, and Rein was like HOLD the PHONE man, you can buy pets??? Isn't that like slavery?? And Wynn was like naaahhhhh it cool, they love you and stuff. And Rein was like OH ok good I was getting worried there. So they went to the shack and Wynn grabbed this pouch thing and hung it on one of Rein's antlers, before grabbing some coin-like things and shoving them in there. Wynn was like, hey, buy something then you can go over there and accept a house to live in. Then she walked away and disappeared into the horizon.

Rein was looking around and came across this little goblin-looking creature, that looked a bit like Id and pointed to it like WHAT IS IT SHOP PERSON? And the shop person was like IT A NORTH MISSOULOU WHAMMY. And Rein was like GIVE ME NOW. So the shop person did, and Rein was very happy. The northie followed her to the home-place, and then there was a person there asking if Rein wanted a house and Rein was like do you think I want to sleep on the freaking street man OF COURSE I want a house.

"Hi!" An owl flew up to Rein, just outside of Rein's house and Rein was confused again. "My name's Owlet! I see you're new to Xanje?"

Rein nodded. "I am Rein. Can you show me around? I still don't really know what to do here..."

"Totally!" the owl smiled and started flying to this grassy-area, where so many humans and animals and creatures were gathered around. She could just slightly overhear some of the conversations.

"Look at this new Westie I got!" "It's so cute, he should breed with my Westie when he's grown up!" "Can I trade you a Rainbow Hound for a Paisley Snowferra?" "I FREAKING GOT LIKE 12 BABIES FROM MY SNOWFERRA LITTER HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE NICK HELP ME"

"Want to get introduced to some people I know?" Owlet asked, looking thoughtfully at Rein. Rein nodded, it couldn't hurt to get to know _some_ people.

"This is Aly," Rein noticed a pink cat talking to someone, "that's Wolfy," a green coloured wolf with glasses was bouncing around a completely black Westie, "that's Rochester," a (wtf is roch's persona help) was standing there and talking thoughtfully to other people, "that's Elo," an alien was staring into the sky, "and that's Marshy!" a vampire, leaning against a tree and crossing his arms. He wasn't speaking to anybody, just watching their conversations. He was quite intriguing. "I've gotta go and deliver some babies, but I'll see you around!" Owlet exclaimed before flying away to outside a hospital, joining a ferret (das terris) and a tan dog (das me).

Rein didn't know who to begin talking to. Everyone was so loud and seemed to be having their own conversations, so she didn't want to interrupt them. Everyone except the vampire leaning against the tree. She walked up to him, dipping her head in a deer-greeting way. The vampire lifted up a single hand and waved hesitantly, still keeping the same straight look on his face.

"I'm new here," Rein muttered. "Have nobody to talk to."

Marshy blinked and lifted an eyebrow. After about a minute of silence, he finally spoke. "People generally are intimidated by me. Especially newbies, why did you decide to come up and talk to me?"

Rein was like wtf you do not seem intimidating you seem nice. But out loud, she said, "We both are alone currently. Who else was I gonna speak to?"

The vampire sighed and shrugged. "I guess you're right. I'm Marshy, you are?"

"Rein."

And the two of them talked until the sun went down, and Rein was developing a liking to this vampire ( _like_ like, if you get what I'm saying here ;D) and she was like oooooohhhhh do he like me tooooooo???

\--------

It was maybe a year later. Rein was well-known in the Xanje world, Marshy was even more well-known than she was. They were best friends ex friends til the end better off as lovers but not the other way around (*slaps self for including fall out boy lyrics*) and they would talk ALL day ERY day. One day, Marshy was like "yo wanna date" and Rein was like "sure" and they lived happily ever after, prancing in the fields for all of Xanje eternity.

**OKAY NOW HERE'S A LITTLE ADORABLE DRABBLE THING BECAUSE I FELT LIKE THAT WAS TOO SHORT...**

"Marshy!" Rein giggled, dipping her hoof into the lake and splashing the water at the vampire. Marshy huffed and scooped some water into his own hands, and splashing it on the deer.

water fight

The two of them finished the water fight and collapsed on the floor together, laughing. They stared up at the night sky.

"Marshy, do you think other people like the fact that we're dating?" Rein asked, turning to face him.

"Sure they do."

"Do you think they...I don't know, write fanfiction or something?" she questioned.

"Obviously."

They both turn their heads in unison and stare at you, the reader.

They see you reading this fanfiction.

They see _everything._

 

THE END


End file.
